*~[~MY LIFE~]~*

Saturday, May 29, 2004

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hello dear blogger today went sch juz for one lesson.
somemore make mi wake up so early...
damn sian lo..
really dun feel like going sch..
i really hate ppl sayin i am sensitive and emotional..
oh gosh frez am i like tat? u guys better tell mi in my chatterbox..
haiz seriously i never ever thought tat i am experiancing wad pearly went thru..
i tried means and ways to improve the frezship..
but it seems no better..
sms them den half way no reply liao.
maybe 4 tis i am sensitive...
but i getting sick and tired..
really can't concentrate on other things..
i hate to go school...
face them and like totally out..
it seems like them treat everyone very good except me..
haiz thou i can pretend nothing happen..
i really dunno wad is wrong with me tat make do they tat?
wad the hell?
i try to tell them tat i care alot for them but none seems to appreciate..
guess no one cares..
in the past everything seems ok
but why now everything pops ok
i am really tired to tok about all tis..
i really feel like giving up..
juz heck them and carry with my life..
i try to tok to them..
but nothing seems to change..
sometym juz hope tat time really will change everything..
today went to jiam hse
tried to be near with them..
but i dunno did i succeed anot
or will everything return to normal..
why when i try more harder den others to treasure them..
but in the end they treat mi even worse?
i am beginning to have the phobia of being with them
i dun wan to get hurt again..
and pls dun say i am too sensitive
is juz tat no one care can?
i really hate tat word tat u all use on me...
do u noe tat from young till now tis word doesn't seems to appear on me?
why always in the most sucky period of time in my life
i got tis type of prob with frez
can't everything go back to the beginning?
haiz guess pearly is rite
no matter wad i say here...
none of them will read..
but juz wan to let out some air..
god pls answer my prayer...
pls pls pls stop all tis..
bring mi with you..
let mi live in my own world..
or change the situation to a more favourable one...
gOd are u there?
pls god u noe wad i want.
wad i had said to you the past few tym..
pls stop all tis misery..
Aman.

[ V O N ] |Saturday, May 29, 2004|

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Wednesday, May 26, 2004

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hello dear blogger... life haven't been good 4 me..
during tis week nearly quarrel with 2 of my frez..
really when a person get sway,anything can happen..
haiz i really dunno why lo...
and my hp cock up again...
printer ink like shit..
and life like a piece of shit...~!
beginning to vent my anger on my dear..
oh gOD~!can't u juz bring mi away from all tis pain?
in sCh.. i like creatin so much unhappiness btw my frez..
make myself so unapproachable..
i really feel terrible..
but hu can i turn to?
sometym is really not i sensitive..
is juz tat u all are far too insensitive...
in me... i really wan to tell u all tat coz we got 5 people tat why got ppl will be left out...
but will there be any diff?
i trying so hard to smile at u all even thou deep in me i feel so terrible..
i suddenly realise all the things u all tok seems so foreign..
dun u all feel tat on the verge of tokking and sharing happiness with one another u are oso at the same tym, make another person left out?
why when u noe tat one person will confirm left out and still dun wan to tok to her?
and why is also mi?
everyday i tot today will be diff..
but it seems everyday the same..
it hurts mi alot to see tat my own frez dun care about mi...
they seems only care about the conversation..
but can u all spare a thought for one another?
i noe 2 yrs can pass quickly..
but i hope to find real frez there?
i dunno wad's wrong with mi tat make tis happen..
and wad i am saying here dun mean to be offensive...
sometym i really wan to say out..
but i feel really terrible..
all of u say u all care..
but why whenever i am alone tat tym no one cares?
i can say tat tis week is the week tat i cried the most in my life..
i really hate tis misery..
i hate SCHOOL!!

[ V O N ] |Wednesday, May 26, 2004|

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Monday, May 24, 2004

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hello dear blogger.. today not really a good day 4 mE..
pErhAPs i am jUZ being toO sensItIVe...
hAI whY dID i beCOME like TAt?
sOmetyM i reALLy hoPe tAT mY smILE aND lAUghtER iS reaLLY geNuinE..
tRyiNG to be niCE tO PEopLE..
buT iT siNCe liKE i aM non eXistence..
trIEd teLLing thEM abOut hoW i feEl..
bUT aLL i geT iS 'we nEed mORE tyM'
i NOe tat iS thE anSwer.. OR raTHEr a mOdeL anSwer..
i aLSO nOT tat wE nEEd tYm...
buT it IS jUZ hOW i feeLIng At tat PT oF tyM..
hAIz i alsO lAzy tO exPLAin toO mUch..
pErHaps juz let it bE..
i aM giVing up..
sAY taT toDAY iS hoUSekeEping..
bUT eNDed uP liKE bOYcottIng mE anD My thOUghts..
i aLSO dunNO...
sEEms lIKe no oNE caN pUT thEMseLves IN mY sHOEs..
OR rAthER duN eVEn wanT tO gIVe IT a try..
aLL i get wAs wORds.. wOrds anD woRDs..
NO oNE uNDerstaNd mE... NOw...
dUn asK mi whY..
i THInk IT iS hOPelEss..
aNywaY dUn feEL liKE toKking mUch..
jUZ cHAnge mY blOg.. aNd hoPe iT wiLL be a bETTer begINNing..
thOU i nOe NOTHIng wiLL chANge..
tmL I wiLL faCe thEM aGAIN..
anD i noe Tat eveN i say out mY thoUghts..
nOThINg wiLL chANge..
oR aT leASt 4 mY saKE..
anYway reAd My fRieNDstER teStimoNiaL toDAy...
recaLLEd aLL thE gOOD tyMEs i HAd wiTH my sEc fREz...
haHA reaLLy reGretted nEver trEAsuRE u guYS as mUch..
bUT jUZ reM tat no MATter BUt.. OUR friENdshiP wuN fADe..
nOt aT aLL fOR tiS lIfetyM..
i noE tat we can't tURn baCK thE tYm..
buT I reALise taT i aM neeDing u guys moRE and more..
thOU i likE to act sTrong oN The oUtsIDe..
bUT wiTHiN me, i REally mISs u gUYs alOt aLOT aLOT..
cHEers .. mY frez~!

[ V O N ] |Monday, May 24, 2004|

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Saturday, May 15, 2004

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hello dear blogger.. haiz today got my cLA test guess really confirm plus chop fail already.. thou i got study but is like i really dunno how to do those tat cannot be study such as close passage and compre.. is like really tough and now den i realise tat my chi is really lousy to the core.. haiz abit regret thinking tat subject.. hMmm den later all of us pei amanda to amk and makan lunch den is like the food there really suck la.. haha abit bu shuang the waiter there also den is like after tat pris,jiamin and mi went to toa payoh k box coz is like amanda cannot make it den is like there really can feel tat all of us is getting closer but doing all the stupid stuff (as usual) together and somemore is like imitating the singer in the mtv.. can like singing duet together and act like couple,dance,eat,shout,sing like nobody business like tat.. haha den is like really very fun today but u noe wad the bills is really high.. i guess is about 67+ dollar.. idiot rite~ haa... hope tat we will continue to be as close as today. cheers my frez... but nevertheless i will never 4get my animal farm too.. really hope tat one day in june all my animal farm de animal is free to go 4 gathering.. and pearly quek dun 4get to go study chi with mi arh.. hahaa muack everyone~~ hehe

[ V O N ] |Saturday, May 15, 2004|

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[ V O N ] |Saturday, May 15, 2004|

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Saturday, May 08, 2004

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hello dear diary haha today went for the romacing singapore activities la.. organise by my sister and company den is like she asked my parents to go ma so i have no choice but to take part lo.. but den is like everyone is busy so is like no one went with mi but in the end yvette decided to give her jap lesson a miss a go with mi.. hehe anyway tat place is really romantic lo.. is like andrea de cruz and pierre , chen zhi cai and xiang yun also got go there.. den is like got 80 couples getting married and taking revows.. haha trust mi the place is really cool.. opps haven't say where is at esplanade threater and the ambience there is like so romantic ...the buliding is like so anicent and classic.. den is like my sis help us took the best seats la with our own corner den is like yvette and i was like keep playing and commenting on each other.. haha and is like so fun and of coz we keep making fun of my parents oso la.. so old still act romantic and as usual.. my dad is like yawning all the way... tat is his style ya.. haha nvm i got take alot of pic also... haha can u imagine the scenario tat everyone gets married in front of you? haha den is like so cool den actually tat place is cannot get married de but den is like gov company den maybe juz let them do once? haha den after tat went sch for homecoming day.. den is like so little ppl.. haha so is like i like go for 10 mins den leave liao den go meet evon and delia and of coz my dear dear lo... hoho...

[ V O N ] |Saturday, May 08, 2004|

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Thursday, May 06, 2004

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hello dear blogger! hahaha so long never update my blog liao later no one wan to come liao.. haha anyway... eRMmmm actually jc life is not as nice after all.. quite stress and tough yeah... haha and sometym is not really nice to make new frez also .. haha maybe juz like to stick to the old ones.. coz is like new frez like foundation not strong den dun haf tat kind of chemisty la.. like they wun care so much 4 u oso tis kind of things.. haha of coz i never say they not nice la.. they are very nice make me have a wonderful time in sch but guess still need a lot more tym to really get close and understand one another really well... eMmmmm and like in sch like noe not a lot of ppl den is like very insecure lo.. haha like when got mafan tat tym dunno turn to whu tat kind of thing.. dun is like dunno them well den dunno they are hao ren or bad ppl.... very scary oso lo.. haha i say till i like in hell like tat... haha anyway guess everything will be better and hope everyone in the sch is hao ren la... haha and nevertheless.. my study sucks there i mean is like never go 4 the first 3 mth and like still slacking here... and i never even catch any ball tat the teacher is saying.... gOsh~ and u noe wad my math lecturer is nuts... she like keeping tokin to herself when no one actually listen.. hahha Jc is full of weird ppl which include my present clique~ hahaha weird ppl~ + fun la.. (muz say they fun if not confirm kana bash tml!) wHAhahaHaa kidding~

[ V O N ] |Thursday, May 06, 2004|

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